My room is safe, at least that’s what I keep telling myself
You see! In my room I don’t have to look at anyone except myself. My Tv is on and I watch silly children cartoons because the cartoon violence is better than the emotional trauma I’m going to catch myself in if I watch something that’s going to make me feel again.
You see, my room is a place I can go to turn your emotion off. Some people think it’s okay to be around other people when you feel bad but it’s not about that. Sometimes I can’t be around you because you feel bad, It’s called being an empath.
I don’t just feel bad, you feel bad and that bad is laying on top of my bad and then someone else bad comes in and tries to squish both of our bads into a bad sandwich that just drags me down into a pile of bad that I cannot escape from unless I get away from all of you so here I am in my room.
It’s not because I hate you, or that I don’t care. It’s that I LOVE you and I CARE too much. So I sit in my room and I make my bed ten times a day because I climb in and out of my bed 11 times a day. I throw a blanket over my shoulders and wish it could go away. Everything you people make me feel burns inside of me like the deep fires of Hell want to burn away at my soul and maybe it already is. Maybe this is Hell.
But not here, not here where I can lock my door, and get away from all of the everythings. Not in my room. You see in my room, I don’t have to deal with any of your monsters anymore, I just have to deal with mine..
